Peenie Wallie

So I roll out of town about 12:00 noon, and when I get about 1/2 there, I realize that I don't have my passport. So I turn around and go back to the Portobelo Hostel and get my passport.

I don't really need to be riding around down here without it. I'm not clear if I'll need it or not, but I have a feeling I might.

Now I leave again for Colon. This time, I make it all the way there. I head straight for the FedEx center in the Zona Libre. They're open, and pretty helpful. She speaks a little English. They can't get their credit card to process the transaction. So I say "No hay problemo..." I'll pay in cash. Only I don't have enough cash on me. Now, she drives to the nearest ATM (Cajero Automatica), and now the ATM gives me enough cash to pay to FedEx the box back to the USA.

So she goes on her lunch break, and I go back and finish filling out the myriad of forms in order to FedEx a package back to the USA. Signing all of these absurd waivers. They even fingerprint me, if you can believe it.

So...OK. Good enough. Mission accomplished. I got the package shipped out. Now, I go and look for a shirt. I find a store, and the girl sells me a T-shirt that should cost about $5.00 in the USA for $30.00. Well, OK. Good enough. At least I have a clean shirt to wear now.

Now, I should mention here, that the Zona Libre in Panama is in complete gridlock because they got completely flooded this week. So, traffic is a nightmare in the Zona Libre grid.

I'm starting to learn the difference between the Zona Libre and the France Field.

So now, I see a store that sells footwear, so I stop in. But they say that, not only do they not sell Chacos, but the only place that does sell Chacos is in Panama City in the Albrook Mall in Panama City.

OK. Well, fair enough. But I've still gotten a lot done. Like...all of this is very hard when you're in a country where you can barely speak the language. And the traffic is all gridlocked by 130" of a rain a year.

But eventually, I head back to the town of Portobelo. As I'm leaving Colon, I stop to gas up at the Terpel gas station. She says my card won't work. But you're never really sure why. Was it declined? Does the machine not read it? It's always so hard to know. I need to put some more cash in my wallet. I need to have at least $500 in my wallet at all times, to prevent what happened today.

As I leave, the bottom falls out of the clouds and it starts to rain. I just keep going and quickly drive out of it.

When I get back into Portobelo, I stop for some grilled meat on a stick from the guy at the bottom of the hill where I stay. Then I walk into the Chino's supermarket. Probably this is one of the parts I like best....walking in and just buying scads of different candies and chocolates and cookies. And CocaCola sin calorias.

Now back outside to the man selling grilled meat on a stick. OK. Now I get it. He lives here. That's his house just there. And his wife. And he has one kid.

Everyone else has left the hostel. I'm thinking about going into Panama City tomorrow or maybe finding a hostel on the beach. But, with no one here, it's kind of slow, it seems.

Finally, today, Waze bothered me enough that I went online and searched for how to fix it. Now, the 3d nightmare is gone, and North is locked "up". So, Waze actually works like a half-decent navigation tool at this point.

Also, when one of my buddies came through here, we copied a file onto my Garmin Montana 600 into the Garmin folder, and now, I have the road maps for Central and South America. Woohoo!

So, my map situation is better. But now, I'm noticing that, for some reason, I'm having a hard time charging my iphone 6S Plus. Now, I have 2 different cables, and I see this issue with both of them. I'm not clear if the problem is the cable, or the phone, or the laptop...I'm not really able to diagnose it at this point. But I plugged in the iPhone to my wall charger, straight into the phone. And it seems to be charging for now. Fingers crossed.

Update: OK. The thing that's confusing (Fuck You, Apple) is that, when it's basically dead, and you plug it in, it doesn't give any indication that it's charging, even if it is. So, yeah...obviously that's confusing. People at Apple should be fired for this. How about you give some freaking indication that it's charging instead of just showing a battery, morons? What am I, clairvoyant? You show a battery icon. That tells me nothing. Zero. But, if you wait, after a few minutes, it will then go to a normal screen, and then you'll see the charging icon (lightning bolt) in the upper right corner. Good job, idiots.